Or is it?
We are surprising the girls with a day at the House of the Mouse tomorrow. Yes, we live within an hour of Disney World and we hardly ever go there. Okay, I know we can get Florida resident passes, and it is cheaper than if someone on the vacation of a lifetime comes down from the great white north. But even a fraction of 'outrageously expensive' is still too much for us to justifiably fit into our budget.

Now our 9 (in 4 days) year old went to that magical land many times before she turned 3. These days ended when we suddenly had to PAY to get her in. I may or may not have a list of friends who teach their recently turned 3 year old children that they are only "2 in Mickey years". Anyway, we had various friends when Breanna could still get in for free, who had those luxurious annual passes, and they would take her with their family to keep their toddler terror company while waiting in all the lines. Worked out GREAT for us, a free day with no kid, and a wonderful day out for her! Woo Hoo! As all parents of more than one child know, it's very rare to have friends who have 2 kids the same ages whom both of your children get along with. And if they do they surely aren't offering to take both of someone else's children anywhere. See that's why we all brought home that 2nd little bundle of joy, in order to have two to keep each other company. You parents of onlies, ask us how that worked for us, before you consider giving your child "company". So what I'm trying to say here is Brooke has no memory of having ever been terrorized by that man sized mouse and his friends, because we've been only a couple times since she's been with us. And sweet little Brooke, she is an aspiring princess, so we've been feeling guilty not giving her the pleasure of visiting the home of the princesses. I mean they live so close, how could we deny her?

So we checked. And rechecked. Passes, which ones cost the least, how many times would we have to go to make the passes pay off? Well, if you don't want to go during the summer, or Spring Break or Christmas break, or the 4th Friday of the month, or on a full moon, or a new moon, or when anyone else might possibly want to go, and you want to pay for parking every time.. Then for the low, low price of $230 per adult and $203 per child you can buy a Seasonal pass. Do the math here... that's $866 for our family of 4. Once the 9 year old turns 10 we have to pay full price for her! Another reason we thought this would be a good time to go to the Black Hole of Money. The regular at the door any day of the year Florida resident prices are $64 and $54 that's $236 for our family of 4. That's make going 4 times during those non-blackout dates to hit the break-even point. Now there are also MAC DADDY tickets. Let's just state here that we are not friends with any doctors or lawyers and all our friends enjoy eating fresh fruit on a regular basis, so we know NO ONE with these tickets, this is purely for comparisons sake. They include all parking, all parks, any friggin day of the year, as long as you have a valid Florida license. That'll cost ya, $460 per adult (or kid over freakin 10 years) and $404 per kid, or grand total of $1728, taking 8 visits to 'pay off'. I do see that the annual passes are a "good deal" in comparison to paying the gate price, but forking over all that cold hard credit at once makes me a bit queasy.

See here lays the essence of the problem , shhh, we really aren't the Disney type. There I said it! Okay, little Princess in training would probably live there if we let her, and I'm sure there will be tears when we leave tomorrow. But the rest of us, not so squeaky clean. Oh, sure we'll have a great time. But give us really big roller coasters, and BEER for the Love of PETE, people need beer at amusement parks, all that hot sun mixed with whining kids = Need for BEER! Yeah so Busch Gardens, that's our kind of place. And maybe next year when little bit is tall enough for the good rides, we'll start doing the break even analysis of Universal or Busch Gardens passes. Right now though, Brooke NEEDS to experience Disney. All her little friends have been, many have even gone on Disney Cruises. Like I said I think hubby and I are missing some child friendly fun gene, because the idea of a whole cruise o' Disney, makes us shudder.

So here's what we decided. 4 visits in one year to a Disney park, any Disney park is more than enough. Making those seasonal passes not worth it for us. Now there just so happen to be Florida residents tickets they promote during the slow periods (Pete knows what qualifies as slow, less than a million people in line for It's a Small World? Anyway that would apparently be now.) for 4 day resident passes. And there just so happen to be 4 Disney parks right here in O'town. JACKPOT! So for the horribly expensive price of $159 per big person and $134 per little person we can hit each of the Disney parks for one day in the next 6 months, any day we want. Can you tell the whole BLACKOUT dates thing really doesn't sit well with us? By the way I counted they blackout 13 weeks of the year, that's about 3 months, and that includes the entire summer. Yes, I know it's hot in Florida in June. Hello, hot in Florida in December. But children are whiny about nothing to do in the summer, sucks that they can't go to Disney even though you spent a mortgage payment on passes.

Now don't even get me started on how the price of the ticket is nothing compared to what we will spend on a cheeseburger, fries, and no FREAKIN BEER!


House o Mouse has plenty of alcohol to consume, just not in the very magical place known as Magic Kingdom. Why would one need spirits and brew there, it has all it's own magic, no need for intoxicated magic?! :) Can you just imagine large groups stumbling through Disney after too many drinks....oh wait, never mind, that's not till September! :)

Anyhow, I have been told that you could always borrow your child's apple juice bottle, I have heard many types of beverages blend quit nicely in this container...or so I've heard!! :)

April 25, 2008 at 2:02 PM  

Funny you should post this, you know we are coming there in June. I know it's going to be hot but it's hot as hell in Houston so it's pretty much a wash for us...so anyway, we can't decide what insanely expensive park to plunk down our money at. It seems wrong to go all that way and not go to Disneyworld especially since the hubs and the child and have never been to anything Disney. I have been to Disneyland a bunch of times but not since I was 14 or so.

We also can't decide how many days to stay in Orlando and how many days in the Keys. So far all I have is our plane tix and rental car.

April 25, 2008 at 3:44 PM  

Disney....granted my little one has not learned that Mickey lives so close but I don't think I could stomach that place more than once every 10 years or so. AND the heat, my god the heat!!! (Elaine quote from Seinfeld).

April 25, 2008 at 4:38 PM  

In case you didn't realize, that was a cry for help!

April 25, 2008 at 4:44 PM  

Raven, I am in the middle of a O'town break down email for you! I did hear your cry, just doing a bit of research for you first!

And Star, thank Pete we are not the only ones who are lacking the "family fun, aka Disney" gene. I feel so much better.

Drama, yes I know the others sell $10 beers, but right now we are talking about the place where the f'in princesses live! NO BEER NEAR THE PRINCESSES!

April 25, 2008 at 4:55 PM  

Raven, between Karen and myself you can have the Otown thing down in no time! I live at Disney unlike my heathen friends, Karen and Star....granted I have three girls that believe in all things Disney...however I have brought my hubby to the dark side, he used to work at Universal, hee,hee! If you have any Disney questions I would be happy to give over the info!

April 25, 2008 at 5:48 PM  

Now Drama quite trying to pull people to the Dark Side! I just emailed Raven with all the much cheaper and more fun (well for a 13 year old boy and his parents) places to go! hee hee!
Remember Raven the Force is With You!

April 25, 2008 at 5:54 PM  


"2 in Mickey years"

made me laugh out loud!

I agree with the beer in the apple juice bottles. Either that or Xanax. And this coming from someone who loves Disney.

April 25, 2008 at 10:44 PM  

Jozet, thanks for dropping by!
And that is an exact quote!

April 25, 2008 at 11:05 PM  

They don't sell beer in the Magic Kingdom... but they do sell lots of coke. And you might be able to get a lime in it. And clear rum looks just like water in a Dasani bottle that you might bring from home. Not that I've ever done this.... not me....


My husband is a Disney guy. He loves the place. I love it when I don't have kids in tow. How horrible is that? But seriously, walking through mobs of people while steering a giant stroller in 90 degree weather and spending $20 on balloons for three kids that I will have to hold while they ride on things... it's not my cup of tea.

The Disney Cruise, actually, was AMAZING. Truly amazing. They have like 12 decks or something and the kids get one of them. They TAKE YOUR CHILDREN from you from like 9 AM to 11 PM and you never see them (unless they page you because your little darling is having a breakdown or something). There were several adults only areas and plenty of alcohol. I'm serious... BEST VACATION EVER. We're going again this year in October and I can't wait.

April 26, 2008 at 5:05 AM  

I went to Disneyland every year of my life, until we took the kids to Disney World for a week. I'm done with Disney until I have grandkids. It's not that it wasn't fun, but there's only so much Disney a gal can take!

April 26, 2008 at 1:15 PM  

I said thank you in my blog, but I wanted to say thank you here too.


Your e-mail was the cat's pajamas!

April 27, 2008 at 10:15 AM  

Newer Post Older Post Home